Empty lines intrigue me. They are full of possibilities. Ink has room to flow in space. Words. I love words.
My son’s fiance noticed that, and a few years ago, for Christmas, they gave me a set of porcelain coffee mugs with inspirational sayings on them.
Freedom to explore.
New journals are loaded with potential. What will the pondering of my heart be today?
Truth is, some days the pages hold pain. Other days, a victory or two. All on paper, it is, thoughts, feelings, musings and observations.
Spring time is a time of newness. Bulbs that have laid dormant now come to life. The garden blooms with little effort. Each day is a new possibility.
Today’s blog is dedicated to those who find it hard to articulate what will fill the lines.
I tend to be a realist as far as life goes. Yes, I dream. But reality was something my family preached when I was a child.
I believe our world has tried to sugarcoat so many things that it has made it hard for people to be transparent with others without the fear of shunning, rejection, or putdowns.
It is what it is.
Survivors of sexual abuse, or any kind of trauma for that matter, often face days where, in the words of one survivor I heard, “Just getting out of bed is a big deal.”
Why is that?
Speaking to this subject matter, not as a person with a counseling degree or license to instruct, but one who has lived through it ..
Shame, despair, feelings of worthlessness because you feel you should have been able to stop what was happening to you .. feelings of insecurity .. can I do this task at hand .. am I enough .. why do I feel like a freak no matter where I am .. why do I get depressed easy .. why do I find it hard to look at life and see the sunshine?
All these feelings impact how you fill in those journal lines .. of this .. your life in the now.
So what then?
We can get pretty overwhelmed if we try to jump four squares ahead on this board game of life.
It has helped me to make a little list of my priorities for the day. Quiet time. Personal grooming time. Work. Lunch. Work. Stop at the store. Etc.
Our list is our own. We make it for nobody else but us. And we say, well I had so much more I wanted to do.
There is a quilt in my closet I need to finish and my garden looks like a pile of weeds right now. I at least cleaned out the bunch of stuff I had been hauling inside my car (no, I have not gotten to my trunk yet.)
My goal is that someday, my car will not make me look like I am homeless, lol.
There. Made you laugh. I bet yours looks like that too. Or maybe your closet does.
Precious One, have a good day today.
We get through this life with the help of our friends.
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